AR-News: (TX - US) Parish the Thought: Eating tasty animals

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Parish the Thought: Eating tasty animals

By Jeff Parish
Texas City Sun

Published July 05, 2004 

Some people look at a cute little piggy or liquid-eyed cow and wonder what it’
s thinking or maybe what its name is. I just wonder if it would taste better 
with ketchup while the rest of it becomes a nice pair of shoes or a jacket.

There are others who wonder how to free the oppressed, captivated animal 
(circuses are a favorite target). Most of these fall under the umbrella of People 
for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, perhaps the biggest bunch of nuts I’ve 
ever seen. Bag them up and you could sell them at the circus.

Look at the response to my article on the Killer Burger Challenge at P.J.’s 
Lunchbox. PETA sent a letter to the editor taking issue with the feature. 

Like much of what the animal rights group does, it started out sanely enough, 
discussing possible health problems with eating meat, such as heart disease. 
I don’t necessarily agree that simply eating meat is going to make you keel 
over (it’s more a matter of overall diet and exercise), but it’s a fairly 
rational argument. 

Unfortunately, the sanity only lasted for a sentence and a half.

>From there, PETA went on to say that “our habit of eating meat results in the 
unnecessary and violent death of 42 million cows each year in the U.S.” The 
letter talked about how “cows value their lives and struggle to avoid pain” 
and are raised on farms where they’re polled, branded and castrated. True, 
anything will seek to avoid pain and danger, but value?

Mr. Webster tells us that to value something is “to think highly of” or “to 
prize” it. Cows don’t value much beyond a nice supply of hay or grass. There’
s a world of difference between instinctively avoiding pain and valuing life.

But this is just one example of a long history of nuttiness coming from the 
animal rights crowd. Just consider these quotes from PETA co-founder Ingrid 
Newkirk:

•“When it comes to having a central nervous system, and the ability to feel 
pain, hunger, and thirst, a rat is a pig is a dog is a boy.”

•“Six million Jews died in concentration camps, but six billion broiler 
chickens will die this year in slaughter houses.” 

•“Even if animal research resulted in a cure for AIDS, we’d be against it.” 


The organization’s tactics aren’t any better. PETA supporters have started 
going after children, handing out “McCruelty’s Unhappy Meals” to kids outside 
McDonald’s. The meal shows a sinister, often blood-splattered, Ronald McDonald 
look-alike. In some poses, he wields a bloody knife or ax. In one, he holds a 
blood-drenched box with bones, entrails and other parts sticking out of it. 
More recently, kids whose mothers were wearing fur were handed a comic book. 
The cover portrayed a psycho mom taking a Bowie knife to a rabbit. 

Sometimes I think these people should have taken cartoonist Jim Davis’ 
advice: “Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.”

You want to be a vegetarian, vegan or even a Raelian, be my guest. But don’t 
dare do something like that to one of my kids or anyone else in my family. 
There’s no real value in such shock tactics. In fact, it is more harmful to the 
cause than anything else. As critic Paul Goodman said, “The damage done by 
those who pass off poison as food is far less than that done by those who 
generation after generation convince people that food is poison.” 

You’re a herbivore. Great. We’re carnivores. Live with it. 

Even if, as our recent PETA letter suggested, there isn’t any “need to 
support such misery, especially when restaurants and grocery stores everywhere are 
stocking up on meat-free foods including veggie burgers and soy hot dogs.”

Please. My meat is going to stay meat and my vegetables, vegetables. Never 
the twain shall meet, at least until I put them on my plate. 

That’s not to say I’m all for torturing animals. But to put them on the same 
level as humans — not to mention even attempting to parallel the Holocaust 
with chicken farms — is ludicrous. I’m certainly not going to stop eating meat. 
And if animal testing can help cure some of our most devastating diseases, 
then go for it. It should be done with as little suffering as possible, but at 
the same time, I’d starve a puppy if it would save the life of my daughter or 
wife.

PETA’s problem is a lack of perspective. Animals should be treated as 
humanely as possible, but you can’t attribute actual rights to them. At best, you can 
outline responsibilities their owners have. In the end they’re just critters. 
Human welfare is much more important.

What can I say? I love animals. They’re entertaining and they taste great. 
Especially on a Killer Burger.

Jeff Parish is copy editor for the Texas City Sun. He can be reached at (409) 
945-3441 ext. 38, or by e-mail at jeff.parish at texascitysun.com. 






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